Ahhhhhh...

The rain smells good tonight. It helps to fill this hole that's opened up inside of me. Change does that to me, creates these new spaces that are disconcerting and like a vacuum, need to be filled. I have to be careful that I'm not filling them with the wrong things - food, shopping, attention. I try instead to turn to things that will create a positive effect - more yoga, more walking, more scrapping. I'm just stuck in this weird place right now between things. Garrett is moving on to a big transition, Reid is gone during the week and I have too much time to fret over their issues and absences before MY crazy busy time starts. I know school will resolve most of this feeling. There will be no time for heartaches and mulling over the minutae of my life. Just progress and intellectual stimulation and issues not related to the ones that are making me crazy right now. It will be good to feel this emptiness subside. Because I know, in the great design of things, these spaces appear so they can be filled with something wonderful and necessary... and I look forward to welcoming whatever will come.